It's happened to all of us at one time or another. I woke up seriously late for work. I'd already been warned that the next time it happened I could get my pay docked or worse. I was so frazzled that I didn't even try to figure out whether I had forgotten to set my three alarm clocks or simply slept through them all.
Yup, I had three alarm clocks: three "Big Ben" wind-up alarm clocks by Westclox. This was the model that held the world record for the loudest alarm that still rings after a hurricane. I used to have a normal alarm clock. Heck, when I was in the Navy, I used to wake up to a wristwatch alarm. That is to say, I used to wake up to my crewmates kicking me because they were tired of hearing my wristwatch alarm. But as a sleep-deprived civilian with no crewmates to kick me out of bed, I had gradually worked my way through travel alarms, radio alarms, and buzzers before I finally settled on the Big Bens. They were placed side-by-side on a shelf above my dresser. An earlier alarm clock had survived on my bedside endtable for nearly a week before my natural reaction to annoyingly loud noises managed to smash it. The three Bens were about ten feet away from the bed, safely out of reach, and carefully set to go off at five-minute intervals. Five minutes was long enough for me to pick myself off the floor (after an abortive smash attempt), but not quite long enough for me to fall back asleep.
All of the above had somehow failed me. It was, according to the clocks, about two hours later than I should have punched in at work. With no way to make up the lost time, I ate a hurried breakfast, showered, shaved, dressed, and headed for the door. But then I heard a strange sound. It was a really annoying sound, yet somehow familiar...
It was my ALARM CLOCK!!!!
I jumped out of bed and shut it off. I must have only dreamed that I'd gotten up before. And the alarm was late (how did that happen?) but if I really hurried, I might still make it to work on time. I dashed through the shower and threw on some work clothes and headed for the door. But then, there was that annoying sound again...
NOT AGAIN!!!
I woke up and jumped out of bed and shut off the alarm and ... was I dreaming again? I wasn't sure. I picked up a book and tried to read it. This was my test for seeing whether I was awake. I don't have a photographic memory, so even though the books in my dreams look real, the words on the page don't make sense when I try to read them. Sure enough, the words blurred and swam and didn't fit together in any reasonable order.
I tried to open my eyes, but it was no use; my dream-eyes were already open. Finally, feeling like Alice at the bottom of the rabbit-hole, I PUSHED my way through miles and miles of soft, feathery resistance and woke up for real.
In fact, I woke up just in time to hear the third alarm clock stop ringing, and I wasn't late for work after all.
